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Masterminds and Wingmen: Helping Our Boys Cope with Schoolyard Power, Locker-Room Tests, Girlfriends, and the New Rules of Boy World
Free Ebook Masterminds and Wingmen: Helping Our Boys Cope with Schoolyard Power, Locker-Room Tests, Girlfriends, and the New Rules of Boy World
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Here is a landmark book that reveals the way boys think and that shows parents, educators, and coaches how to reach out and help boys overcome their most common yet difficult challenges - by the best-selling author who changed our conception of adolescent girls.
Do you constantly struggle to pull information from your son, student, or athlete, only to encounter mumbling or evasive assurances such as "It's nothing" or "I'm good"? Do you sense that the boy you care about is being bullied, but that he'll do anything to avoid your help? Have you repeatedly reminded him that schoolwork and chores come before video games only to spy him reaching for the controller as soon as you leave the room? Have you watched with frustration as your boy flounders with girls?
Welcome to Boy World. It's a place where asking for help or showing emotional pain often feels impossible. Where sports and video games can mean everything, but working hard in school frequently earns ridicule from "the guys" even as they ask to copy assignments. Where "masterminds" dominate and friends ruthlessly insult each other but can never object when someone steps over the line. Where hiding problems from adults is the ironclad rule because their involvement only makes situations worse.
Boy world is governed by social hierarchies and a powerful set of unwritten rules that have huge implications for your boy's relationships, his interactions with you, and the man he'll become. If you want what's best for him, you need to know what these rules are and how to work with them effectively.
What you'll find in Masterminds and Wingmen is critically important for every parent - or anyone who cares about boys - to know. Collaborating with a large team of middle- and high-school-age editors, Rosalind Wiseman has created an unprecedented guide to the life your boy is actually experiencing - his on-the-ground reality. Not only does Wiseman challenge you to examine your assumptions, she offers innovative coping strategies aimed at helping your boy develop a positive, authentic, and strong sense of self.
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Audible Audiobook
Listening Length: 13 hours and 10 minutes
Program Type: Audiobook
Version: Unabridged
Publisher: Random House Audio
Audible.com Release Date: September 10, 2013
Whispersync for Voice: Ready
Language: English, English
ASIN: B00ENJYN9I
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
This is one of my MOST HIGHLY RECOMMENDED BOOKS.I purchased this book for two reasons. I had read Rosalind Wiseman's other book, Queen Bees and Wannabees, which was ABSOLUTELY SUPERB; and I had a current student (boy) who was being physically bullied at school, and was looking for some new ideas on how to help him.Masterminds and Wingmen was equally good as her first book, and I did find a very small (but adequate) amount in this book (about two or three pages) which dealt with strategies to use when someone is being physically bullied. They were helpful in that I had not thought of them before. It covered IF you need to fight, the issues you really need to be aware of first. It also gave some suggestions toward solving the problem without fighting that I had not thought of before (and I speak as both a parent and a teacher of 30 years' experience). If you are looking for a book specifically on how to deal with boys' problems of physical bullying, I would have liked a LOT more on this subject, but so far, I haven't found any better book. At least what this book touched on was useful.Aside from the question of physical bullying, this book was FANTASTIC. I am a parent, but not of boys. I would recommend this book to any parent, and to EVERY TEACHER. I learned so many things that I had never even thought about.The most surprising chapters for me dealt with every aspect of video games. As a person with zero interest in video games, I learned all about why they are so important to elementary-school and middle-school boys. Several chapters cover every aspect of how boys relate to each other through video games, and how if one understands the characters and ideas in video games, how one can much better understand boys' thinking and mentality (and even married men's thinking and mentality). I now think I will try out a few video games--not because I'm expecting to love them, but because this experience will help me better relate to my young male pupils as a teacher.This book covers many, many different aspects of boys' culture, thinking, and daily dilemmas. It is the perfect book for girls and women to read in order to understand the culture of boys and men.
I read the book because my preteen was telling me very little about his social life. He began creating excuses not to go to school, all the time. He was crying and begging me not to go. I would ask him why or ask him to tell me what was going on... he's such a private, bottled up, quiet boy, however, he shows his emotions through boxing, throwing darts, being destructive, yelling, gaming.... come to find out; he is being bullied, (and has been, for a few months now. My son told me that anything he tried to do to avoid conflict, it wouldn't help) and he's not the only one in his class that is getting bullied, all by the same child. Immediately, I called my son's father, we are divorced, and told him I was calling a meeting with the principle and or vice principal and our son would not be returning to school until a plan for the bully was in place!A very resourceful book!!Written with sensitivity to the issues that young men are facing today and ways that we can help them to become more confident, well rounded, and find their inner strength.I took so many mental notes, plus handwritten reminders for myself, for the upcoming conversations I will soon have with my son. I also wrote the I PROMISE/ HE PROMISES contract out for both my son and I; to discuss and sign.
I cant say enough about this book. If you have a loved one (child, grandchild, nephew) who is a teen/preteen boy, you absolutely MUST read this. If you are a youth pastor or teacher or scout leader of a teen boy, you absolutely MUST read this. I heard about it from a friend, who heard about it through her son's school (in colorado). the school is doing a series of book club/ discussion groups on this book for parents of boys about to enter middle school. I would love to start a similar parent's discussion group at my son's school! If you think preteen and teen "girls are hard" and that "boys are easy" , it is only because we don't know what is going on inside a boy, but their teen years are JUST AS tumultuous as girls. The author points out that she isn't writing this so that you can confront your boy and make him talk about everything in the book; rather, her intent is that you gain an understanding and awareness of your son's world to better support him. Just read it!!! You won't be sorry.
I'm reading this to my son and as we got to the part of self image he started to cry because he could identify with the moobs torment.These comments have left my mini me very hurt and we were able to open a dialog that needed to be.His father died a year ago so I have to play both rolls. I had to tell him he had moobs too "yeah those were from muscles""no he could fill a nice a or b cup, which I didn't mind being on the opposite side. So it comes naturally" I didn't go into deets on lipo and how many men deal with them that way but you get the gist. Reading this with your child, or listening, is ideal.Like "motherless Daughters" was for me I hope to gain insight into being a great wingman.I'm saddened my video would not uploadCTG
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